Winning a Custody Case: Documenting the other parent’s negative impact on the kids

Legal Lotus - Family and Trial Attorneys

When you’re striving for winning a custody case, having evidence of the other parent’s negative impact on the children can be a significant factor. From behavior issues to non-compliance with visitation schedules, these pieces of evidence can shape the case outcome.

Focus on the Other Parent’s Faults

If you want to win a custody case, you must provide evidence about the other spouse in such a way that the judge believes you are the parent the child must spend the majority of his or her time with.

This does not imply character attacks, but it does suggest that you must record anything that has an adverse influence on your spouse’s parenting ability. Of course, you must never start out to demonstrate what you already know is false.

Highlight your spouse’s shortcomings

When you highlight your spouse’s shortcomings, don’t be distracted by general lifestyle issues but rather focus on facts relevant to parenting. It is common for parents to mention their spouse’s new girlfriend or boyfriend immediately. As a matter of fact, the court is only concerned about this new partner if it negatively impacts the children.

If the children do not have much contact with a new spouse, or if they see the person a lot, but it is not a negative situation, then the court will not care. In addition, if your ex is gay, the court won’t care (although some older judges may still harbor prejudices) as long as there is no impact on your child, the same as if he or she is reuniting with someone of the opposite sex.

As long as your spouse does not behave that way with the children, the judge will overlook your spouse’s lying, scheming behavior toward you. When you are still recovering from the end of your relationship, it can be difficult to accept that you can be a terrible spouse and a good parent at the same time.

Your ex-spouse’s qualities, personal decisions, and activities on the matter in the custody trial if they have a detrimental impact on the children.

Use the list of parenting abilities form in this book to record situations that reveal your spouse’s shortcomings as a parent. Incidents that may be notable include the following:

  • Unable to provide your child with essential medication
  • Unwilling to learn regarding your children’s disability or medical needs
  • Inflicting physical punishment or mistreatment of your child (although spanking a child is not illegal, many judges disapprove of it)
  • Not monitoring your child adequately, resulting in injury or risky circumstances
  • Never attended a parent-teacher meeting to talk about your children’s progress at school
  • Driving under the influence with a child in the vehicle or driving and using a mobile phone
  • Leaves the child with unsuitable babysitters
  • Oftentimes late in fetching up the child from class or events
  • Misses major occasions in the child’s life, such as performances, school events, birthdays, and holidays, among others
  • Unable to spend and utilized visitation time with the child
  • Does not provide basic proper hygiene or nourishment for the child
  • Unable to obtain access to the school’s online grading system
  • Fails to employ fundamental safety precautions such as seat belts, childproofing, and so on.
  • Causes arguments with you or mistreats you in front of your child

While your perspective on the situation is crucial, consider who can back you up. Are there any friends, relatives, or neighbors who have seen the acts you’ve described?


The legal process can get difficult, which is why we always recommend that you seek the assistance of counsel; or at least have a consultation. Schedule a consultation with one of our attorneys today to review the issues of your case, the legal options you may have, and certain rights that pertain to your unique situation.

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